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    13/04/2007

    无奈

      感觉很无奈
      酒店里的生活不是很适合我,因为乱,也因为累。说到关键,是心累。每天要看着别人怎么做,也许一不小心,就被别人算计了,我不喜欢被人算计,因为我不喜欢算计别人,可是这又能有什么办法呢?每天看着上海人,听着上海话,总是会觉得自己很无奈。
      记得当时到COURTYARD面试的时候,我是多么的高兴,因为这是世界上最好的酒店管理集团MARRIOTT旗下的酒店,在这里可以学到很多东西,只是后来才知道,在中国,即使是外国的酒店,也会不一样。没有所谓的公平,没有所谓的培训,有的只是实习生的辛苦,付出的廉价劳动。虽然有“苦其筋骨,饿其体肤,空乏其身”的体验,却没有一点大丈夫的感觉。
      好像出来之后,就学会了自己欺骗自己了,告诉自己没什么,半年很快就过去了,可是没有那么简单的。忽然之间就会了吸烟,反而酒就喝的越来越少。宿舍阿姨也说不要吸烟,对身体不好,可是没办法,我不吸烟,就不知道该怎么发泄了。吸烟忽然成了发泄的方式,好像很不合理。忽然想起了在学校宿舍里面,大家躺在床上,一起想象实习的事情是多么的顺利,多么的惬意。现在想想,那个时候的自己太幼稚了,幼稚的简直不能想象。
      不想长大,长大之后,烦恼太多太多了。

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